Once a good girl has gone bad, she’s gone forever

“Once a good girl’s gone bad, she’s gone forever.  I’ll mourn forever, shit I gotta live with the fact I did you wrong forever.”

That is a line from one of my favorite Jay-Z songs, “Song Cry.” Every time I listening to this question, I always think to myself what he said is the truth. Every girl I have every known that has made that turn from good to bad has never been the same after that.

During my 10th grade year, I dated this girl *Latrice who I really cared deeply for. We had an up and down relationship and this was my first true love. I wasn’t truly happy in my relationship with Latrice, but instead of breaking up with her, I started to talk to another girl. This was really immature me and I wish I had ended our relationship. Latrice found out and while we continued to date, I broke up with her. I knew she was not the girl that would marry or end up with.

While I haven’t talked to Latrice much since high school, she started to change and she dated the one person who I disliked the most. About four years after our breakup, my mom and her mom saw each other in Wal-Mart. Latrice’s mom told my mom that she hated her boyfriend (which was the same guy she dated after me) and that Latrice was pregnant. Her mom alos told her that she wish that me and her had stayed together. Since then, Latrice has had two more kids and didn’t graduate from college or achieve the dreams that she had set in high school. She also looked like she was over 200lb when me, my mom and stepfather saw her, but that another story. My point is that I feel like I had a part of changing her. I feel like I broke her heart and she never was the same after that. While she might had changed for the worst  anyway, but I feel like our breakup didn’t help. She went from the nice guy gentleman like myself to one of the worst people she could date.

I feel like when a guy breaks a girl’s heart, she finds it very easy to rebel. It is like she has something to prove to that guy, even if she no longer sees him. I felt like Latrice wanted me to want her again and get jealous because she was dating someone I know. That is why I felt like she told my friends about the guy she was dating. She knew it would get back to me and maybe she thought I would get jealous, but by that point I had moved on.

My last girlfriend was in an abusive relationship. She said she been mentally and psychically abused by men in the past. She had a hard time trusting men and took me for granted. She ended up breaking my heart, but I got the sense that some guy really broke her heart in the past. That explains why she didn’t trust men.

When a women loses that trust in men, she loses her self-value and in turn, she dates someone who is her inferior and not someone who is her equal. That is why you see a lot of young girls and women dating guys that are wrong for them.

A good girl who turned bad may not always stay on the bad course, but she will never be the same person before their heartbreak. Her innocence can never be restored.

So guys out there, before you break the heart of your current girlfriend, think about letting the girl down gently. There is nothing worst than a girl who is still holding on to the past and that thinks that all men are bad.

(*Latrice is not her real name.)

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